I really don't understand how athletes and public figures get themselves into these situations but I think I get what happened here. Sometimes you're at a party and you wander over to the fridge to grab a beer and you stumble on a few guys blasting rails on the kitchen table. And of course they offered Matty Mauk free cocaine. Those are the perks of operating under center for the worst passing offense in the SEC. So I know I'm not about to sit here and judge anyone for accepting free drugs. And in Matt's defense he looks very much like a guy being pressured into doing drugs for the first time. Powder disorganized and all over the table. Not really snorting anything but pretending to have done so. I'm no expert but I'm pretty sure butterknives rarely come into play in these situations. So Matt just went with the flow and it's hard to knock him for that. When you're trapped in a room with strangers and cocaine you either pretend to blow lines or starting singing. Matt chose the former.
NESN - The New York Yankees will set aside their rivalry with the Boston Red Sox for one night this season. Yankees owner Hal Steinbrenner spoke to reporters in Florida on Wednesday and told them the club plans to honor David Ortiz during his final series at Yankee Stadium. The retiring designated hitter will make his last trip there with the Red Sox from Sept. 27 to 29.
“I am sure we’re going to do something,” Steinbrenner said, per the New York Post. “We have not formally, minute by minute, figured out exactly what we’re going to do yet. He’s a great player, great part of that franchise. Everything you like to see in a player.” The Red Sox did the same for shortstop Derek Jeter’s retirement, so it’s no surprise the Yankees are stepping up. Boston had a ceremony at Fenway Park for Jeter before the final game of the 2014 season, while Red Sox fans chanted his name earlier in the series.
This better be a joke. I'm going to go ahead and let the vagueness of that Hal Steinbrenner comment leave the door open for reconsideration because this would be the softest move in the history of sports. David Ortiz is the enemy in every sense of the word. The worldwide love affair with him is possibly the most frustrating thing I have to deal with as a sports fan. For it to culminate with a memorial at Yankee fucking Stadium would make my physically sick.
All this guy has done for the last 13 years is break the Yankees' back and pimp every home run he's ever hit against them. He walked it off two nights in a row and brought the Yankees to their lowest moment in franchise history. He broke the curse and changed the entire dynamic of Yankees/Red Sox that existed for 100 years. And he's a FUCKING CHEAT. He was linked to the same exact list that nailed A-Rod in 2009. All he did was wine, stomp his feet and deny it and everyone still believes him to this day. Well not me. Me and my friends will buy front row tickets to this ceremony and throw tomatoes at him. And he will get booed. There isn't a chance in hell he's going to get an ovation of any kind and if you're there and you cheer this asshole then you're not a fan. You're a fucking loser. Yea the Sox honored Mariano and Jeter. Well guess what? They deserved it. Those are two universally revered players. No one of sound mind could ever dislike Mariano for any reason and if you don't like Jeter then you're fat and ugly. I can prove it.
YAHOO - You know the game: Two teams arrange 6-10 plastic red Solo cups into a triangle shape at opposite ends of a table, fill each cup with cheap beer, then take turns skillfully (or not) arcing a ping pong ball into them. Hook a ball into your opponent’s cup, and he or she has to down the beer inside.
It’s simple. It’s fun. There’s lots of drinking. And nothing much has changed for, well, ever. That is, until beer pong aficionados (and mechanical engineers!) William Heimsoth & Aaron Attebery unveiled Hexcup on Kickstarter.
Hexcup is the classic red plastic Solo party cup reimagined. Instead of a round, smooth rim, it features a hexagonal shape and a reinforced base. It is, as its makers say, “the best beer pong cup in the world” and “an improved way to play.”
Why? Per Heimsoth and Attebery’s research, the Hexcup solves game problems like:
First of all anybody who says they're too old for beer pong can fuck off. If you're at a backyard bbq and there's a pong table set up and you don't get that itch then I don't want to know you. I went to a graduation party this summer and fucking ran the table against a bunch of 21-year-olds. Felt like Tim Riggins when coach let him suit up in practice after he graduated.
Anyway these cups SUCK. What's improved about it? It's easier to play? It's easier to rack? It's supposed to be challenging. I'd be sinking shots like Chauncy Billips with this equipment. My cups shouldn't be shaped like a fucking hexagon, perfectly racked alongside one another with some sort of reinforced lead base. Pong is about smooth cylinders vaguely positioned together as they slip all over the table. It's about 45 minute games where nobody can hit a cup and only end when someone stops paying attention and wanders off. It's what separates the men from the boys.
PS - I was playing one-on-one beer pong with my gf in college and she was beating me so bad I puked all over her dorm room floor. Things were never the same after that.
Wow. In the back of my mind I kind of just thought Mike was going to keep this up forever but here were are. The Mike Francesa Farewell Tour. Not surprising he announced it two years in advance. One-year farewell tours are for peasants.
I have the same thought process today as I had the days Mariano and Jeter announced their retirements. Thank god for the extended notice. Without enough time to process this information I'm not sure how I'd handle it. I listen to Mike every single day that he's on. I wake up early when I'm hungover on Sunday just to listen to him before football starts. He's the most consistent pillar in my daily routine. I don't know how he did it. Intentionally or unintentionally, Mike's the single most entertaining, fascinating figure in sports media history. The fact that he's been able to stay on top for so long and attract new generations of followers and fans despite completely dismissing social media and every technological advancement since 1990 is mindboggling. There's going to be a moment in 2018 where I'm going to look up at the clock, it's going to read 1pm, I'm going to turn on WFAN and the Mike's On theme song is NOT going to be playing. It's going to be one of the saddest moments of my entire existence.
PS - If Mike chooses to keep working his post-FAN career may actually surpass his current career. All I really need is a live feed of him in his Sunday attire watching football all day. That would get billions of views. I'd buy another TV just to watch that.
If you were like Alex and I you spent this weekend with your feet up enjoying the NFL playoffs. Maybe you got up to go out to a bar and watch Aaron Rodgers ruin your 7 point Arizona cover. Maybe you didn't. But a few things happened in the baseball world that got lost in the shuffle so let's cover our bases.
Chapman, Eovaldi, Didi and Nova all file for arbitration
The Yanks are pretty close to terms on the three former players - it's Chapman's case that may actually end up going to trial. As it stands the two sides are more than $4 million apart (the Yanks look like they're trying to lowball him IMO). They offered him $9 million - a $1 million raise from last season - where his projected figure had been set at around 12.9 (he's asking for 13.1). The Yanks may be trying to capitalize off this pending investigation into domestic violence allegations but I have a feeling it'll be Chapman getting what he wants and not the other way around.
Marlins and Dee Gordon finalize a 5-year, $50 million extension
Pretty nice bargain for the Marlins - 10 mil a year for a guy who just won the batting title and lead the league in stolen bases. And a pretty cool story for a guy who looked like he'd completely lost the ability to play baseball a couple of years ago. It'd be a bummer for him to have to spend the next five seasons playing for Miami but by becoming a Marlin he's been permanently placed on the trading block by proxy.
Ian Kennedy to the Royals for 5 years, 70 mil
I never thought I'd see the day that Ian Kennedy would be making this kind of money. The market for starting pitching right now is absolutely outrageous. This dude had 15 losses and a 4.28 ERA pitching in Petco Park last year. But like the Yankees, the Royals aren't going to be asking a whole lot from their starting pitchers. If he makes 30 starts with a 4.50 ERA he can win 15 games this year easily. Certainly worth it for them. Orioles sign Chris Davis, 7-years - 161 mil Wrote this a couple of days ago - unfortunate news that Chris Davis is going to be spending the next 7 seasons hitting against the Yankees twenty times a year. He might be the most dangerous hitter in the game when he has been spending the entire pregame blowing crushed up addies gets hot. It also sets the market for Justin Upton higher than I would've liked but that's still a pipe dream at this point. I wouldn't worry about this move changing the complexion of the AL East this year. Davis generally sucks every other season and he just lead the league in homers so expect either a .190 BA in 2016 or another lost application for a therapeutic use exemption.
Jake Arrieta, Cubs can't come to terms on arbitration
The cubs offered Arrieta and absurd $7 million for 2016. Considering the pitching market and the fact that they just agreed to pay Jon Lackey $32 mil for the next two seasons I'd say the Cubs should maybe go back into their pockets and compensate this man properly for one of the best pitching performances in their franchise's tortured history.
Jansen, Strasburgh and Harvey all agree to terms - Josh Donaldson and Blue Jays almost together
It is so infuriating as a Yankee fan to glance over Josh Donaldson's contract and accept the fact that he's under team control through the 2018 season. How we probably had the same bag of balls to ship over to Billy Bean's office in order to get him. And how instead we'll be paying Chase Headley $13 million a year for the next three years to be one of the worst players in baseball.
It's pretty crazy how good Kenley Jansen is. I feel like nobody ever talks about him. His numbers aren't quite as impressive as Chapman's but they're up there. He'll make $10.65 million this year and will be in line with Chapman to receive the two richest contracts ever for relief pitchers in 2017.
The fact that Stephen Strasburgh is making more than twice as much as Matt Harvey this year is outrageous. Now Harvey is making more than 5 times this season what he made last season so there's that, but it's pretty incredible how Strasburgh has been surpassed as the next big thing by about four other pitchers in the NL East. He hasn't lived up to the hype but he hasn't exactly been a slouch with a career 3.09 ERA. Players who are drafted out of high school may now hire agents to negotiate with teams before they decide to go to school or not
You would think this would lead to higher bonuses for first-round selections but it probably wont. If someone offers you an $6 million signing bonus as a 17-year-old your agent probably isn't going to be able to leverage the team with a scholarship to Long Beach State.
Tom Brady is probably the best quarterback of all time so he's kind of entitled to do whatever he wants to get ready for a game but I fucking hate these little fits he throws. Travis Kelce is a goddamn monster and he doesn't need some mary who can't benchpress 135 pounds jumping around in his face and screaming like he's going to hit someone. Mocking the greatest qb of all time right before a playoff game is a ballsy play but I love Travis Kelce so I love the move.
Unfortunate news that Chris Davis is going to be spending the next 7 seasons hitting against the Yankees twenty times a year. He might be the most dangerous hitter in the game when he has been spending the entire pregame blowing crushed up addies gets hot. It also sets the market for Justin Upton higher than I would've liked but that's still a pipe dream at this point. I wouldn't worry about this move changing the complexion of the AL East this year. Davis generally sucks every other season and he just lead the league in homers so expect either a .190 BA in 2016 or another lost application for a therapeutic use exemption.
